S, M, L

I hope this doesn't come across as rude, because I don't mean it to. But whoever said size doesn't matter, was not a woman. Yeah that sounds bad. But its true, and anyone who says it isn't true is lying. What you do with it regardless of size and the way you work is, yes, equally as pivotal. But if you have not-so-much to work with well chances are the show won't be that great. Maybe I just haven't given the average-to-small folk enough of a chance. And I'm not complimenting myself in anyway or suggesting that I am a seasoned professional (or in more laymen terms: a slut) but I really would bet that most women agree that size really does matter.

Size is a multifaceted term of course. And applies to all sorts of details such as curvature, width, length, and I could go on. This all may seem a little shallow and objectifying, but personally I think it's a nice claim in the superficial judgment department for women. I mean really I won't be stupid and make the argument that women are less obsessed with the physical make up of their counterpart then men because that gets shot down as quickly as it gets brought up. I have my own opinion on it, but I think it is safe to say that women are more actively judged physically than men. Done. Wording that was exhausting.

I could be proved wrong, on both the above, but truly I have been yet to be excited by something small downstairs. It's like shaking a present at Christmas, hearing the sound of jewelry inside the box, tearing open the wrapping only to find home made reindeer toes socks from grandma outfitted with bells. Essentially, disappointing. There is an equivalent for women though: push-up bras. I'm sure there are plenty of men who have taken home the cute brunette they met at the bar with the amazing rack, gotten her in bed only to find out that the seemingly perfect D's have quickly deflated to B's. Nothing against B's, it's just an example.

I guess the only difference is that sex doesn't conventionally require big breasts. And if you're really that fixated on your boob size or lack there of you can always get a surgical enhancement. No such luck for guys there either. Hmm. It's a little grim isn't it? To be born lacking in that department. But I could just be being a little harsh, and I'm sure I could be completely proven wrong. A man knows when he is shit out of luck, I mean I have bigged up guys I've been with before. Made them feel like it's really God's gift to women down there, faked it. And sometimes after a while it works and with the added boost a new confidence begins to grow which is more attractive than anything in reality.

Like the male version of a push-up bra.